Shadow (kagedreams) wrote,

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Hakushaku to Yousei Vol 5 summary part 2

Grar! How is it that this volume's 'summary' is even longer than volume 4's?! This is getting ridiculous! >.<;; (I know what the problem is; it's because I'm reading as I'm 'summarising' and am essentially translating parts instead. *sigh* Still this is ridiculously long. ......Especially since this apparently needs to be split into a *third* part. O_O;; )

Nico has tea with a gentleman at the harem. From what Nico's seen, the people that frequent that place aren't in their right mind, but since they're not harming anyone, he figures it doesn't really matter. Commenting on how the person he's been having tea with is decidedly sick, the man surprisingly replies and tells him that he's in his right mind and that the next room's person is much more ill than he. While the man Nico's having tea with has had life size dolls made of ladies, he knows that even though he stares at them, they don't see him, and that even if he talks to them, they won't answer. However, the next room's person is obsessed with the woman in the pictures on the walls and is convinced that she's in love with him. He also thinks that if he gets two diamonds together, she'll come back and he'll be able to have everything he wants.

While the guy next door normally comes very often, apparently he hasn't been by lately. Just as Nico wonders about the noise from the goblins digging below, they break through the floor of the room he's having tea in, and comment that they're in the wrong place. Nico asks the goblins what they're doing, but the goblins tell him it has nothing to do with and dismiss Nico thinking he's just a cat. Before the goblins can close the hole they created behind them, Nico makes himself invisible and jumps in.

Perhaps from having gotten wet in the rain, Lydia goes to bed early suffering from a headache and chills. Nodding off, she dreams of being back in Scotland and thinks that it's unlikely she'll go back to London. In her dream, she wonders how things would've turned out if she'd stayed--would she have gotten married? But she figures that sooner or later, things would've ended up the way they were now with her back in Scotland. Lydia tells herself that it's okay and that she wasn't necessarily heart-broken and that it's good that things ended before she did come to love him. Likewise, she doesn't think she could have come to love him. After all, he was the type who wasn't particular about who he seduced. Touching her lips with her fingertips, she feels that that had been the worst mistake she'd ever made. Edgar had asked her why she couldn't understand and even going so far as to say that he'd give Kelpie the diamond. To Lydia, that was obviously a lie, but she still felt bad about what had happened.

She suddenly hears Coblynau's voice asking her if she was crying but can't see him. Lydia denies that she's crying, but Coblynau tells her that Bow told him that she's very sad and hurting. Lifting her hand, she realises the moonstone ring is still on her, and she wonders if she'd forgotten to have him take it off her before returning home. Lydia asks Coblynau to take the ring off her since he agreed to annul their engagement, but Coblynau tells her that he hasn't done that yet and that Lydia has run away to the dream world instead. However, Lydia doesn't want the ring, and she has no intention of marrying Edgar. Coblynau agrees that the earl is somewhat unfaithful, but she mustn't lose to another woman since she's his formal betrothed.

Lydia tells Coblynau to leave her alone. While she might have hurt Edgar's feelings, she too was feeling hurt over things. As far as she could see, he wanted to marry her in order to have a fairy doctor by his side, so his trying to seek comfort from her, using her in place of someone else, was simply too much. She'd had enough of his lies that he really was attracted to her. He probably wasn't even hurt, so she wished he didn't act hurt.

Coblynau asks her not to cry and that he and the other coblynau would do what they could to help. He tells her to leave everything to them and they would see to it that the earl only had eyes for her.

Lydia's head aches badly as her dream ends, but she immediately falls back asleep. When she finally wakes, she finds herself someplace very bright and realises it's so light because of a chandelier. Lydia jumps awake as she realises that there was definitely no chandelier in her bedroom.

Lydia finds herself lying on a long narrow sofa. The room beyond the see-through curtain is richly furnished and seems familiar to her. Lydia tries getting to her feet only to realise that she can't move easily thanks to her clothes. Raising an arm, she finds that she's dressed like a princess from Arabian Nights and that she's in Edgar's harem room. The blonde figure was nowhere to be seen, and the clothes that had been on the doll was now on Lydia. Her hair, arms and legs are heavy with gold and jewels, but her clothes are decidedly light.

Looking at herself in the large mirror, Lydia almost doesn't recognise herself and notices that she's wearing the black diamond. Stunned, Lydia has no idea what's going on.

Coblynau notices that she's awake and tells her that he's kicked the lover out. The one who deserved to be in that room was the earl's betrothed and she'd also said she wanted the black diamond.

While Lydia hadn't been serious when she'd said she wanted a diamond, fairies don't understand that sort of reasoning which is why Kelpie, too, tried to give her a diamond. Annoyed with having spoken imprudently then, Lydia tries to take of the veil she's wearing, but it's held firmly in place being connected both to the tiara and to her hair.

Coblynau tells Lydia that the earl would undoubtedly become enamoured of her again although she too needed to understand the earl's tastes a bit since he seemed to like outfits like the one she was in. Coblynau reassures Lydia that the women coblynau were the ones who'd dressed her. Apparently there were a large number of rare stones in London so there were a number of his people there working away from home. He goes on to tell Lydia that they've taken emergency measures to ensure that the curse remained quiet, but that it would take time to get things back to the way they once were. He warns Lydia not to be rough with the diamond as there are limits to Bow's protection as well. Coblynau gets up to leave and Lydia asks him if he was going to just leave her there. Coblynau tells her that the earl would arrive soon, and that he would only be in the way of the two. Before Lydia can say anything, Coblynau disappears.

Lydia figures she needs to get away, but at the same time, she can't go outside dressed the way she was. And since there was no other clothing there for her to change into, she had no idea how to get home.

Just then, the door slowly opens. Lydia lowers the curtain and lays down on the sofa. While she didn't intend to pretend to be the doll, that's how things end up. However, Lydia realises that the person who came in wasn't Edgar. Even though she'd been brought there by fairies, she figured no one would believe her. Likewise, she didn't want to be discovered and thought of as some strange girl who'd snuck in wanting to become a princess in some harem. Most of all, she didn't want Edgar to hear that some girl had been there who was jealous of some doll.

Lydia hopes the person who snuck in will leave quickly, but that person cautiously creeps further into the room. Lydia can't make out the man's face and can only tell that he's a middle aged gentleman with a moustache. The man, however, clearly knows who the doll is.

The man talks to 'Jean-Mary' telling her that he'd fallen in love with her from the first moment he ever lay eyes on her. And even though their parents had arranged their betrothal, he'd eagerly awaited their marriage. Yet 'that man' who claimed to have fallen in love with her at first sight ended up ruining everything.

As Lydia listens, she realises that Jean-Mary was indeed a real person, but doesn't know who 'that man' referred to. Likewise, she doesn't know when the events occurred.

The man continues talking about how that man had used his authority to steal her away. The man in the room only wanted her to realise that god had decided for them to be partners and that their marriage had been determined before they were even born. And while she may not have known about it, it was extremely important. Had she married him, that tragedy would never have occurred. The man then asks Jean-Mary if she's angry because her husband's--Duke Sylvanford's--reputation had been damaged.

The man asks her if perhaps she'd realised what was happening and that he was the one who'd hidden the diamond. The diamond didn't belong to the Hanovers, but belonged to their prince. The man decides to stop talking about that and tells her that he's started to question continuing following the prince since he'd even sacrificed her.

Lydia finally realises that Jean-Mary, who'd been married to Duke Sylvanford, was Edgar's mother and that the person responsible for the white diamond's theft, the man in front of her, was the man Edgar had mentioned--Marquess Birkstone. Edgar had given the black diamond Nightmare to a doll that looked exactly like his mother.

Birkstone figured that if Duke Sylvanford died, Jean-Mary would return to him. He never thought she would also die and that's why he supported going after the duke's house. However, Birkstone figured that Jean-Mary had a right to the diamond as did he. And that if they could gain the power of the legendary diamonds......

The man suddenly lifts the curtain and enters the far room startling Lydia who freezes and she recognises him as the person who'd been in Hyde Park with Ulysses. He demands to know who she is and where Jean-Mary is when he notices that Lydia's wearing the black diamond necklace. He grabs Lydia holding her down on the sofa and starts strangling her. Lydia tries to struggle against the man, but he tightens his grip and she feels herself start to go faint.

Edgar uses his skillful conversation to control people and taking advantage of their weaknesses he entices them to destroy themselves. Since he could do that, Lydia couldn't help feeling that she was also easily being controlled by him. His words and actions were completely by design. But Lydia couldn't help being trapped by those instances which couldn't have been by design. Lydia wonders if Edgar saying that Kelpie could have the diamond was just another of his lies. He'd wanted that diamond to protect his family's reputation, and had been continuing with his plan to trap the marquess, so the diamond should be much more important than Lydia. It wasn't like him to tell such obvious lies. But Lydia couldn't help thinking about it and whether it might've been said out of irritation and not out of calculation. Lydia cries out for Edgar to save her and can only think that she's such an idiot. Someone was trying to kill her because of the trap Edgar had set.

Birkstone's suddenly dragged off of Lydia and by the time she's able to open her eyes again, she sees Edgar throw Birkstone to the floor roughly. Edgar tells Birkstone that Jean-Mary had told him to bring her Daydream, and since he'd failed, she wanted nothing to do with him.

Recognising Edgar as Earl Ashenbert, Birkstone asks him why Edgar's there. Edgar tells Birkstone that that room was his and that the wax doll and the diamond were his. Edgar tells Birkstone that he also needed Daydream, and Birkstone had betrayed both the prince and Ulysses as Edgar had planned for him to do. However, since Birkstone had failed, Ulysses was now after him and it was only a matter of time before he was caught and killed.

Birkstone tells Edgar that the prince had taken note of him as well since he'd named himself the Blue Knight Earl. However, Ulysses had been making fun of him since he had no actual power. Edgar tells him that it's a shame that Birkstone won't be around to see Edgar triumph.

Edgar then turns to Lydia who's flustered over her current appearance. She tells him that Coblynau had done this saying something about her needing to go along with the things he likes and that she mustn't lose to a mistress... and that she didn't know what was going on either since she'd been there dressed like that when she woke up.

Edgar tells her that if she's Scheherazade and told him stories of the fey at night, he would undoubtedly become completely enamoured of her in a single night. Lydia can only wonder at how Edgar tries hitting on her regardless of the situation they're in. Edgar tells her he's glad that she's all right and that since she'd called out for his help that most likely she doesn't hate him.

Edgar asks the marquess if the prince targetted Duke Sylvanford just for the diamond. Birkstone laughs at Edgar for thinking of fighting the prince even though he didn't know that much. Edgar pulls out his own pistol and aims it at the marquess aiming to get him to talk, but the marquess tells Edgar that he'll die soon anyways, so his threat was meaningless. However, Edgar tells Birkstone that even though people know they'll die soon, they often don't want to die right away. Edgar cocks his pistol aiming at Birkstone and stares steadily at the marquess who's showing signs of panic but still refusing to say anything. Lydia watches as Edgar slowly pulls the trigger, but the gun doesn't fire. Edgar curses mildly commenting that he'd forgotten to load the weapon. He then loads a single bullet into the weapon and fires twice at the marquess without result. By this time, the marquess is trying to crawl away from Edgar only to be pulled back in place by Raven.

Birkstone then tells Edgar that what happened to the Duke's house wasn't his fault, and that everything was because of the son that had been born. Edgar asks him what the son did, and Birkstone tells him that the prince realised that the duke's and Jean-Mary's son was almost ideal, much more than any child that the marquess might've had with Jean-Mary. He then goes on to explain that Jean-Mary had Bonnie Prince Charlie's blood in her. Likewise, Birkstone had Stuart blood in him. So in order to strengthen the blood that had only been growing thinner, it was decided that Birkstone and Jean-Mary would marry. All of that was carefully planned out for the prince's sake. Duke Sylvanford lost everything because of his son and because he'd stolen Jean-Mary from Birkstone. If the duke had married a different woman, that sort of thing wouldn't have happened. Likewise, if Jean-Mary hadn't bore a son, things would've been okay. Or even if the son didn't survive to grow up. Birkstone then tells the earl that if he wants to destroy the prince, then all he had to do was kill that son; that was probably the fastest way to do things.

Lydia finally yells at Birkstone that everything was the prince's fault. Birkstone had only been rejected by his fiancee and the child was not to blame.

Edgar tells the marquess that Jean-Mary had forgotten about him and that, just as she never questioned the husband her parents had chosen for her, she agreed when they told her to marry the duke. Moreover, she'd been pleased at the ideal of being called your grace. She was sweet and ignorant and was satisfied with being treated like a princess; she was a typical noblewoman. He goes on to tell the marquess that the only time she remembered him was when the marquess had written her a letter in commiseration over the duke having fallen under suspicion for the diamond's theft. However, perhaps it was women's intuition, but she sensed ulterior motives and artifice in his letter. Edgar tells the marquess that he won't forgive those who support the prince. And if it means the prince's destruction, then he'll kill Ulysses, the marquess, and the duke's son as well.

Thinking that he would kill the marquess, Lydia yells at Edgar to stop and grabs hold of his arm. She's afraid that after killing Birkstone, Edgar might turn the gun on himself. Just then, there's a loud noise and the whole building shakes. Edgar protects Lydia as a nearby silver statue falls over. Seeing his chance, the marquess escapes and Raven quickly goes after him. A hole then opens in the wall and goblins come out and notice the marquess escaping. They start digging through another wall in order to go after the marquess.

Edgar peers into the hole in the wall made by the goblins, and Lydia warns him to stay away from it; inside the hole is goblin territory and not the human realm.

Edgar continues to stand with his back to Lydia thinking. He'd said that he would kill himself if it meant destroying the prince. And while Ulysses had been ordered to kill Edgar because he was no longer usable, Lydia couldn't help wondering if they would still try to take Edgar alive since, if Jean-Mary's son had been the key, with her dead, the only way to continue that bloodline was through Edgar. Lydia realises that Edgar would most likely consider his own death as a possible choice in seeking revenge.

Lydia asks Edgar not to blame himself and tells him he's not the least to blame. Edgar still doesn't turn to face her but tells Lydia that he wasn't surprised by what the marquess had said; he'd suspected that he was the cause. Lydia tells him it's why he was targetted, but that he wasn't the cause. However, Edgar tells her that in a fit of rage, his father had told him that he should never have been born. His father pulled a rifle on him, and his mother tried to protect him. However, he doesn't remember what happened after that very well. The next thing he knew, his father and mother were both on the floor bleeding and the mansion was on fire.

Lydia draws close to Edgar and tells him that he doesn't have to remember what happened and that he'd only gotten caught up in things. Edgar asks Lydia if he can hold her, but she's scared to say yes. She suspects that if she did, things wouldn't stop there. Edgar asks her to hold him instead, and Lydia hesitantly wraps her arms around him from behind. Since the best she could do was grab hold of his jacket as he held him, she suspected that he found her embrace rather lacking, but Edgar puts his hand over hers and thanks her. Relieved, Lydia lightly rests her head against his back.

Edgar realises that Lydia's rather warm to the touch and turns to face her. Realising she has a fever, Edgar suggests they go and that he'll see her home. He then takes off his jacket and puts it over her shoulders.

Lydia tells Edgar that leaving might be a problem, however. Edgar opens the door to the room only to find boulders blocking the other side. Lydia explains that the goblins had created a path through there and that the faerie world and real world had become intertwined there, and that they had to wait for the goblins to come back. Edgar suggests Lydia lie down on the sofa and starts going through the cabinet. He never expected to become stranded in the middle of London, so there wasn't any proper food in the room.

Feeling the chills, Lydia pulls Edgar's jacket around her tighter. Edgar comments that the outfit's too light although he appreciates the view, and his comment makes Lydia quickly cover her belly with the jacket as well. Had he known Lydia would wear the outfit, Edgar would've been more particular about the design. Lydia asks Edgar why he'd dressed his mother's doll in such clothes, and he admits that he had to dress it in such improbable clothing otherwise it made him ill seeing how similar the doll was to his mother.

Edgar brings back a bottle of brandy and glasses as well as some fruit he'd found in the room. Lydia's careful not to touch Edgar when he hands a glass of brandy. Edgar notices and comments that while she'd held him, she wouldn't allow him to touch her and asks her if it's because he'd kissed her.

Lydia changes the subject and comments that Edgar hadn't been able to ask Birkstone everything he'd wanted to and that the marquess might be killed by Ulysses if the goblins catch him. However, Edgar has pretty much put everything together and why the guy's called 'the prince' as well. Lydia hesitates about asking him to explain since he might not want to tell her about something so core to the prince. Edgar asks her if she doesn't want to know any more about anything that involves him, and Lydia asks him if it's okay for her to hear about it. Edgar tells her that he's learned very well that nothing good happens from hiding things from his fiancee.

Edgar asks Lydia if she knows about James the Second being exiled to France from England in 1688 and how his descendant two generations later tried to attack England claiming his right to the throne. Lydia remembered what she'd heard from her father the previous day about the royal diamonds and how James the second had been exiled. Edgar explains that Bonnie Prince Charlie was James the Second's grandson, and he'd attacked England in an attempt to regain the throne but was routed. Jean-Mary was supposed to carry his blood and most likely the prince is also a descendant or at least is perhaps is closely related by blood. Edgar figures that more than wanting the diamonds because of the legend behind them, most likely, the prince wants them to substantiate his claim as the Bonnie Prince's descendant and claim the title of Prince of Wales. While there's supposed to be no direct male descendant of the Stuarts, if you follow maternal lines, there are ties to a number of royals and members of the nobility throughout Europe.

Lydia wonders if the prince intends to return to England, but Edgar tells her, if so, most likely it wouldn't be in the same manner as previous attempts. While the marriage between Duke Sylvanford and Jean-Mary had gone against the prince's intentions, his plan didn't end with it. Learning from Edgar that he carries the blood of a number of royal families, Lydia realises that that was why he was more ideal to the prince; because Jean-Mary's and the duke's child would have thicker royal blood. Edgar tells Lydia that most likely they wanted him in order to create the next prince.

Lydia thought that a strange way to word things and asks Edgar why the prince didn't use his own child as his successor. Even if he didn't have a male child, it seemed impossible to be able to force a kidnapped child to becoming his successor when the child hates him.

Edgar explains that most likely, it wasn't to get a successor in the normal sense of the term because the people in the prince's organisation believe they can change people however they like. If he'd remained there, most likely his self would have been lost, and he would have been made into someone who thought and felt the same way as the prince does.

Shocked at Edgar's revelation, Lydia realises that most likely he'd seen and experienced things with the prince that were much worse than the tragedy that had occurred at the duke's house. She couldn't even begin to imagine what he'd experienced. And Lydia can't help feeling that her embrace most likely didn't give him any comfort in the true sense.

Edgar continues telling Lydia that the organisation was rather unusual. For one thing they seemed to believe a lot in certain magic-like things. Even if the descendant of the exiled king were to claim to be the crown prince, there's no way for him to ascend the throne. And yet the prince was trying to regain royal blood and use that person as his own puppet. Their methodology was so strange it was almost as though he was trying to force the creation of the prince.

Lydia becomes thoroughly confused. It was simply too much for her fevered brain to comprehend.

Edgar tells her that the one thing that bothers him, however, is Ulysses. While he'd never actually met him while he was with the prince, from what he'd heard said, he was under the impression that he was an older person--as though he'd been with the organisation for decades. It's one thing if, despite appearances, the person they knew as Ulysses were in his forties, but based on appearance the person they knew as Ulysses looked to be in his teens or was perhaps a very young-looking twenties. And that Ulysses was already a part of the organisation eight years earlier when Edgar had been taken. However, if the current Ulysses was the second Ulysses, then that too would make sense.

Lydia asks if by second Ulysses Edgar means Ulysses's son. Edgar says it's a possibility, or that another possibility was that they remade the personality of a boy who had the ability of a fairy doctor. If that were the case, then he was a victim like Edgar.

Edgar tells Lydia that she'd once said that she didn't want a loveless marriage. Most likely that was the right way to go about things. For the nobility, marriage was a means of continuing the family lineage and as long as there were children, it was normal for both partners to have their own lovers. If his father had fallen in love with his mother and stolen her from the marquess, Edgar figures most likely it was because his father just wanted to have her and that they were like many other noble couples. But if his father and mother truly loved one another, and if their marriage brought them some completely unforeseen calamity, even though their child was carried a terrible future, he suspected they wouldn't have been driven to despair. He then tells Lydia that the man who married her would undoubtedly live very happily--he'd be greatly loved and as a family they would find happiness. Edgar wonders if it was impossible for him to have that happiness.

Lydia doesn't know if Edgar could find such happiness, but at the same time, she couldn't see him wanting something so mundane. She didn't know if he held any hope for a future after seeking vengeance on the prince. She felt that, in order to finish everything, he might even seek his own destruction and that he bothered with Lydia in order to dream of that impossible future even if only for an instant. But for him to dream of something so impossible might mean that he really wanted something so mundane.

Edgar tells Lydia he really does want to marry her. While he was in America, he'd been in command and that's what his followers wanted of him as well. But Lydia knows that he's good for nothing and all talk. From the beginning she'd seen through his inconsistencies, yet despite that, she still felt for him and helped him. So he wants her to continue as she has been--as his equal. She doesn't have to sympathise with him. But having her with him and having her scold him makes him feel like he won't end up becoming like the prince. But feeling that she might come to hate him if she thought he had too many faults, he hid the fact that he'd set a trap for Marquess Birkstone.

Listening to Edgar, Lydia wonders if he can't not try seducing her whenever he opens his mouth, or if he really would be saved if she accepted marrying him.

Kelpie's annoyed at all the noise from the goblins digging and wonders if they're digging holes throughout all of London. Since the holes they dig is close to the fairy world, digging too much could also affect the human realm. He stares at the white diamond and wonders what to do about it. The goblins' master wants it as did the Blue Knight Earl. But the earl had refused the deal Kelpie suggested, and Kelpie wonders if Lydia's more important to the earl than the diamond. If so, it wasn't what he expected. Kelpie knows that countless rumours surround the earl about his womanising, so he'd thought that the earl wanted to keep Lydia with him as one of his hangers-on.

Kelpie stares at the diamond at the bottom of the lake. The magic of the stone is almost dizzying. As he stares at it, he suddenly hears Lydia calling him. Surfacing, he walks towards the trees where he sees a figure. Lydia runs over to him and hugs him. Realising she's shaking, Kelpie carefully wraps an arm around her shoulder. Since he's not used to dealing with people beyond treating them as prey, he's a bit careful with Lydia. Kelpie's filled with affection at the feel of Lydia's frail body. While eating a person is satisfying only for a short time, what he feels when he touches Lydia is something that never disappears. Lydia tells Kelpie she's had enough and wants to go back to Scotland, but that Edgar was refusing to annul their engagement and was trying to force her into marriage. Kelpie can feel fey blood in Lydia's golden-green eyes. She was a fairy doctor because she has fey magic in her. And it's possible that there was magic in her eyes too. Kelpie tells Lydia that he would speak to the earl and if he didn't agree to annul the engagement he'd eat him... he'd protect her and make sure the earl could never come near her again.

Lydia asks Kelpie if he still has the diamond. He admits he was thinking about throwing it away, as he gives it to her. The look of happiness on Lydia's face fills Kelpie with happiness as well when Lydia suddenly vanishes and Kelpie sees Ulysses with the diamond in hand.

Kelpie demands to know what Ulysses had done. Ulysses tells Kelpie that the diamond's name is Daydream and that he'd only called forth its magic. Ulysses had wondered what a kelpie was doing in the middle of London, and realises that he was after the fairy doctor.

Kelpie glares at Ulysses. While he seems a lot smaller and more frail than the earl, he had fey magic in him, so Kelpie didn't dare attack him unthinkingly. Kelpie asks Ulysses if he's the Blue Knight Earl's enemy and Ulysses tells him he's been ordered to kill the earl. Kelpie tells Ulysses that he doesn't care if he kills the earl, but he'll regret it if he harms Lydia. Ulysses then tells Kelpie that the earl's allies are his master's enemy and that the girl is no exception. However, he'd been willing to let her go if Kelpie takes her away from the earl. Ulysses wasn't interested in fighting with Kelpie since it would only waste time. Ulysses suddenly disappears and Kelpie discovers a hole where Ulysses had been standing. Kelpie decides that he has to get Lydia away from the earl even if by force, and shifting into horse form, he runs off.

......Don't ask about the history part; I'm not that familiar with the British monarchy (or any monarchy really...) so I tried to follow that as best I could. ^^;
Tags: hakushaku

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  • Not Much

    Quick post. Hakushaku to Yousei is about to enter the final arc with the next vol (to be released Mar 30). The afterword a couple vols ago did…

  • *headdesk*

    Do *not* look at/read the Another (novel; I don't think there's an anime entry) Wiki if you don't want to get spoiled. >.> I was looking for…

  • Another (novel)

    So, Shadow was bad and found a copy of the novel online. ^^; From what I've read so far... I'm still not sure I want to buy it as I'm not sure I'm…